Super Doomed Bros
by MarxCrispyFish
Summary: The Subspace Emmisery is trying to take over the world,again!Can the Brothers and Sisters stop the chaos?Rated T for violence & Language
1. Normal Times

**Author's Notes****: This is my 1****st**** story (woot!),**** Super Doomed Bros, ****about all...wait, I'm not gonna peep any details out; you just read for yourself, I'm gonna try to mention every character at least once, enjoy & rate!!**

"I so-a can beat-a you!"

"Can not!"

"Can too!"

"Can not!"

"Can too!"

"Not"

_The arguing kept on going on for half an hour. Mario & Sonic,2 well known rivals, were arguing about who could eat a whole pie & then swim around the Mansion's luxurious ,colossal poop-err um I mean pool, yeah pool!10x Without tossing their cookies, or should I say PIE! (i.e. not throwin' up). In the end, the results were a plumber with mild obesity & a blue fastass hedgehog which both had da flu (BUM-BUM-BUMMMM) in the medical room & a pool with over 5 gallons of puke that's out of order. The 2 rivals were in bed havin' a conversation._

"Mama Mia! That was-a retarded _&_ a waste of-a pie," Mario said in a bit of anger.

"Yeah, but you gotta admit that was fun, hey Retardio, pass me my coffee," Sonic said.

_Retar...I mean,__** Mario **__handed over Sonic's caffeinated beverage (which he pissed in, I won't get into details)._

"Enjoy, caffeinated porcupine!" Mario said.

"Hedgehog!"

"What-aever."

_Sonic chugged down his drink in 3 seconds not even noticing the salty flavor. Two people came in the room with one of those "get well soon" cards & a box o' chocolates, it was Peach & Luigi._

"Hi Mario!" said Peach & Luigi at the same time.

"Hi Peach, hello Luigi!" said Mario.

"This is for you Mario, hope you like it!" said Peach

"Hey! Don't I get something?" asked Sonic curiously.

_Peach got out something & threw it at Sonic._

"Owwie,"Sonic complained like a toddler," Chill out pills, I get some extremely crappy chill out pills that 'evens' me out while mustache man gets chocolates & a card!?" Sonic said aggressively.

"Yup pretty-a much,"Luigi said.

"…Sweet!" Sonic said" I got some very cool chill pills while Mario gets all the crap, WOOT! (sang to the tune of that awful "Blue's Clues" tone)

_Mario opened his box o' chocolates & was surprised to see only 2 chocolates instead of 20._

"Mama Mia! Where are-a my chocolates!?" asked Mario 25 angry & 75 confused.

"Oh-a yeah heh heh," said Luigi.

flashback

_Peach & Luigi are runnin' away from Kirby, our pink, always hungry hero down the hall screaming "Chocolate" & other random sweets that start with the letter "C" like a maniac…honestly, who does that!?_

"Chocolate, cookies, caramel, and those little cherries you put on cakes… cakes!"

"Oh crap! I'm runnin' out of energy! Luigi, take the chocolates & spare me the energy!" Peach said dramatically.

"Coca-Colaaaaaaaaaa!"

"Uh oh! Take them now, you know what happens when Kirby starts saying those high-in-sugar, caffeinated liquids," Peach said even more dramatically.

"Okay, okay!(Damn you vile woman.),"Luigi said.

_Peach handed off the chocolates to Luigi way to fast so unfortunately, the delectable, savory, mouth watering chocolates fell (whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!?) & died (and by died, I mean they got eaten by that disgusted puffball.), only 2 survived._

_present_

"Yeah, & that's what-a happened." Luigi said with a guilty tone.

"Well, at least he didn't eat the cookies in the oven," Peach said gleefully.

"COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKIIIIIEEEEEEEEESS!!," Kirby screamed at the top of his lungs, followed by King Dedede saying "I hope their high in fat."

"Damn it!" Peach said, "I gotta go Mario, see ya! Why if one of you bitches touch my cookies, you'll never see food again!"

_Faster than a speeding bullet, Peach left the room._

End of chapter 1

Sorry if the chapter was short & if I didn't mention a ton of characters & if this chapter didn't mention anything about the plot, but hey, this is the 1st chapter.


	2. Things get serious

**Author's Notes****: Yeah, the 2****nd**** chapter is here, I promise I will mention a lot more characters in this one, and about that 25 angry & 75 confused thing, it should o' said 25 percent angry & 75 percent confused, & If your gonna post any negative comments about my story, either save it or gimme advice.**

_In the kitchen you would see a sexy, super aggressive lady beating the crap out of a poor, hungry, pink puffball & a super fat penguin with a burned, beaten robe with anything harmful she could find in the kitchen, even Wario who was in the mood for a sandwich, but ended up in Kirby's mouth._

"Do you still want to steal ma Cookies!?" Peach asked brutally.

_King Dedede foolishly replied who then ended up in the oven which was set at 350 degrees (f) & was in there 'till Peach had finally calmed down which took about several hours. She let him out & went to paint her nails & argued with Zelda about who was cuter & all that crap princesses would complain about. It was night & everybody was sleeping, the pool was finally clean (but still smelled like dog breath), the indoor garden was locked, & the halls, training room, kitchen (which was still beat up), bathrooms, & any other room (but the brawlers' rooms) were deserted. Outside the mansion, near the cliff where everybody poses, was a tiny little purple-ish black particle no bigger than a dime or so. The next day, the tiny particle wasn't there; instead there was an army of primids, sword primids, boom primids, & any other type of primid you could think of. Ike came out of the mansion along with Marth, Link, & Meta Knight just cause it smelled like Wario's farts again, who were then outrageously stunned to see the army of Primids. The 4 brave swordsmen battled the army & destroyed about 48 primids, clobbered 34 boom primids, assassinated 29 scope primids, murdered 22 sword primids, cutted 18 fire primids, & embarrassed 12 metal primids. After that, our heroes then got destroyed, clobbered, assassinated (half only), cutted, & embarrassed by the surviving primids. Ike was bleeding to death with severe burns & huge bruises, Marth had a huge amount of broken bones & minor cuts, Link had a leg broken & major scorches, & poor Meta Knight had a bunch of bruises. The primids left in a ship & attached a note on Link's shield._

"Let this be a warning," Link read it out loud as well as he could say it

_Popo & Nana came out for some alone time even though they are extremely young & saw the courageous swordsmen._

"I remember the 1st time I saw you in the playground & I said…- Holy Crap!" screamed Popo in surprise.

Ike spoke in a gruff voice & said, "Uuugh, hey kid in the blue, Potty right?"

"you'll regret this Ike!" Popo said this with an angry tone.

"l need you to go get master hand right now I.K.Y.I.Y.D.D.I.A.S.A.P."

"Don't you mean A.S.A.P.?" Nana asked.

"No! I'll kill you if you don't do it as soon as possible."

"Dramatic…" Said Popo convinced.

_So Popo & Nana got Master Hand to pick up the swordsmen, got them in the medical room, Master Hand got Ness & Lucas (my favorite characters in the game) to use PK Healing ,Lucas got scared at the site of all the BBBBBs(Bleeding, Bruises, Burns, & Broken Bones) & Ness couldn't because he used his power to pull a prank on Lucario._

"What did you do!?" asked the disembodied glove.

"I gave him memory loss & told him he was a pervert," Ness grinned.

_Lucario started calling anyone shorter than him "midget" & anyone fat "elephant" & started saying chocolate like a maniac which made Peach extremely furious thinking he also stole some of her chocolates so Lucario also ended up in an oven._

"_Is it permanent?" asked Master Hand._

"_Nah, just temporary," Ness said smilin.'_

"_Ness! I am gonna kill ya!!" Lucario was pissed. (Who couldn't tell?)_

"_Crap!That's my cue; See ya Master Hand!" Ness immediately teleported out of the room & into the one place nobody would find him & he would be happy… (answer at the bottom of this chapter)_

_Back with the swordsmen, Link handed Master hand a note with all his strength._

"'Let this be a warning', who gave this note to you," asked Master Hand.

"Santa Clause & the Easter Bunny," Meta Knight replied sarcastically.

_Crazy Hand came in the room by breaking the door, & giggling._

"I told you Masta Hand! They do exist!" Crazy Hand shouted excitedly.

_Master Hand slapped his younger bro & scolded him, causing him to get out of the room & cry._

"What was that?" Ike asked in confusion.

"I'm being serious! Who gave it to you?" Master Hand asked.

"The Subspace Emmisery," answered Marth triumphantly,"& we got to kick some primid ass, which explains why were all beat up."

"I fear horrifying events coming our way, I must tell the other brawlers about this catastrophe," said Master Hand

"Yeah, you do that," the four swordsmen replied.

**I hope you liked this chapter; the next one's coming super soon.**

_**Q: Where did Ness teleported?**_

_**A: Candy land & if you're thinking this is retarded, it's not, no one can find you here & you can eat all the candy there is, I too would pick Candy land.**_


	3. Le Meeting, Mother Friendship

Author's Notes: I hope you're enjoyin' da story so far, things are getting' more serious now ,Marth, Ike, Meta Knight, & Link have recovered by borrowing Red's Max Potions, (works on pokemon & people) & Mario & Sonic had healed up

**Author's Notes:**** Sorry it took a long time. I hope you're enjoyin' da story so far, things are getting' more serious now, Marth, Ike, Meta Knight, & Link have recovered by borrowing Red's Max Potions, (works on pokemon & people) & Mario & Sonic had healed up already, right now everybody (even Ness) is at an assembly near the entrance, enjoy da next chapter.**

"Attention smashers, this is your favorite hand & no, I'm not your right hand, it's Master Hand, I have good news & bad news, the bad news is that the subspace emissary is still alive & are gonna destroy us,"

"Then what's the good news?" asked Captain Falcon.

"Candy Land exists, thanks to Ness's fear of aggressive dogs,"

_Master Hand took out multiple pictures of Candy Land & passed 'em out. It showed a picture of a chocolate river with a gingerbread bridge following with a gumdrop road & green coconut for grass with lollipop flowers & marshmallow petals & whipped cream bushes & a gorgeous background with a mountain made out of marzipan & cake & hiding in one of the whipped cream bushes was Elmo, the evil little red monster holding a sign that said 'Elmo knows where joo live!XXOO-Elmo'. The site of the picture made Kirby faint & the site of Elmo gave Lucario ideas. Besides Ness, everybody was stunned seeing the luxurious picture, especially Kirby._

"We have 2 choices, 1: we stay & destroy Tabuu's army or 2: we all move to Candy Land!" said Master Hand.

"Not all of us can use those PK thingy moves to teleport to Candy Land, y'know," Captain Olimar said.

_His 6 pikmin were all speaking the language they spoke & soon started fighting 'cause they were arguing about who would get the last pickake (some kinda pikmin cupcake). They all died in combat except for the toughest one who choked from one of Wario's super pedos (that means farts in Spanish) which lacked oxygen & had a ton o' methane so it too died. Captain Olimar smacked himself in the forehead & sighed._

"Then it's settled, we take down the emissary & stand triumphant!" Master Hand announced.

"Like, what if we don't like, stand triumphant & all die?" asked Jigglypuff like a girly girl.

"That won't happen." said Master Hand.

"But what if it does" asked Pikachu.

"I SAID THAT WON'T HAPPEN!!" Master Hand shouted at the top of his lungs.

"You have lungs?" asked Fox.

"Is that important right now?"

"If we fail, can we move to Candy Land?" asked Toon Link.

"How can we move to Candy Land if not all of us can teleport, besides I think that someone already lives there," said Zelda pointing at Elmo.

"Ness & Lucas can teleport us there," Toon Link replied,

"Son of a!" Ness & Lucas hate having to teleport people.

"All of you, SHUT UUUUUUUUUP! We need to be prepared for the next time they attack," Master Hand announced, "We'll discuss more tomorrow."

_The assembly ended & everybody went to the dining hall to eat dinner. In the dining hall, Ness & Lucas were having a conversation about friendship or something._

"Don't you think you could be a bit nicer to Lucario? Besides, everybody hates him thanks to you," Lucas said.

"Heh, When Pokey farts in front of my face," Ness replied & took a bite of his steak,"Mmmmmm…Steak!"

_Ness started having one of his daydreams about himself & steak. The setting was in a realm with a pink horizon & hearts of all sizes scattered in the background. The Mother 3 love theme music was playing while Ness, & the piece of steak were running towards each other with their arms out dramatically._

"_Ooh steak," Ness said in his dream while running._

"_If only…" (still running) "We could be…" (running about to stop) "together" (running stops) (about to give each other hug) "foreve-"_

_Now in the real world, somebody made a HUMONGOUS FART right in front of Ness's face which interrupted Ness's dream & everybody noticed._

"HACK! COUGH! What the hell was that for Wario!?" Ness asked extremely bitterly.

"What? I didn't do that! I'm like, 17 feet away from you; everybody knows I can't walk 2 feet without a water break," Wario replied, "remember?"

flashback

_The Smashers were taking a fieldtrip to McDonalds & they were only 3 meters away from the entrance. Wario was whining 'cause he couldn't walk another step & everybody else was already in the building. Sonic was the first one in line (duh)._

"Welcome to McDonalds! May I take your order?" the cashier asked sweetly.

"I'll have the iced coffee, hazelnut if you don't mind?" Sonic replied politely.

"Sure! That will be 3 dollars, 19 cents please," the cashier said.

_Sonic paid up & took his coffee._

"Ah! You can't beat the great taste of – what!? My coffee's gone!" Poor Sonic had no more money to buy another coffee.

_The bandit was Snake, Wario's best friend._

"Hurry Wario! Drink the coffee before you go into the light," Snake handed Wario the coffee.

"What?(gasp)You(gasp)Feed(gasp)Me(gasp)"Wario returned the drink slowly.

_Snake got the drink, took off the lid & dumped the liquid in Wario's mouth. After this, Wario got hyper & tore down McDonalds but got extremely buff._

_present_

"Oh yeah. And thanks to you, we got banned from McDonalds, I still miss their Anus Burgers," Ness said in guilt.

"It's an Angus Burger," Lucas corrected,"Now stop talking about McDonalds & get back to the subject!"

"Oh Yeah…I forgot. So who did that?"

_Next to Ness there was a fat kid with blond hair._

"Tee Hee! Hi Ness, remember me? It's me, Pokey Minch,"

"Ugh! What do _you_ want you obese lard? Came to spoil another moment with your cheesy farts?" asked Ness

"Actually, I just did, and I'm proud of it!" Pokey smiled.

"…PK Fire!" Ness set Pokey on fire.

"Aaaaahh!! It burns! Aaaaahh! Get it off of me! Aaaaahh! Start your day off right by eating a fresh bowl of Mini Wheats, part of a complete breakfast."

"1: it's suppose to burn, 2: I'm not doing that, and 3: Mini Wheats just gives me diarrhea!"

_After Pokey left the building, Lucas convinced Ness to talk to Lucario. When he returned, Ness was all beaten up & barely standing._

"What happened?" asked Lucas.

"Uuh… the bastard used force palm on me several times," Ness fell to the ground moaning in pain.

"Did you at least use PSI Magnet?"

"What? That actually works on force palm?"

"Heck that's what won me a battle"

"Cool! Hey, if you don't mind, can you use PK Fire on me?"

"But you're crippled."

"Not like this!"

_Ness used PSI Magnet so Lucas could perform PK Fire on him. When that was over, Kirby came to ask Ness a favor._

"Can you PLEASE take me to Candyland?"

"Um… I'll think about it,"

**End of chapter**

**Author's Notes: I am so freakin' sorry that took a month to type. I'll make it up to you. Post a review & put something you want me to do in the story, but please leave a compliment.**


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